WWE Fastlane 2017

Anthony Joki is the Owner/Editor-in-Chief of Forever Rebuilding and is one half of the 1085 Gridiron Podcast covering all things Browns.

WWE Fastlane, Live from Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Sunday, March 5th, 2017
Commentators:  Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, and Corey Graves

Michael Cole alongside Corey Graves and Byron Saxton welcomes us to WWE Fastlane on the Road to WrestleMania.

Sami Zayn vs Samoa Joe is up first. A video package shows how this match came about.

Non-Title Match
Sami Zayn vs Samoa Joe

The bell rings and here we go with the debut of the Samoan Submission Machine Samoa Joe. A huge reaction for Sami starts off this match. Joe starts off with some very athletic kicks and quickly gets Zayn into a submission as Zayn is able to get to the ropes. Zayn and Joe go back and forth in the corner with massive right hands. Joe hits Zayn with another massive kick to the head as a loud “JOE! JOE! JOE!” chants fills the arena.

Joe continues putting Zayn in various submission holds. Zayn lands a clothesline and then a Blue Thunder Bomb. The cover 1… 2… kick out by Joe. Zayn heads to top rope and misses. Joe counters with an atomic drop, cover 1.. 2.. kick out. A powerslam by Joe followed by a cover, 1.. 2.. Zayn kicks out again. Zayn plays possum and gets a roll-up, 1..2.. kick out by Joe.

Joe is going for a superplex but Zayn blocks it. Joe gets the Coquina Clutch. It’s over.

Winner by Submission, Samoa Joe

Commentary from our newest contributor at Forever Rebuilding, Ricky Davis,

“Oh my God, this is an opening match. It reminds me in a way of TNA opening Bound for Glory one year with Samoa Joe vs. Jushin Liger. I have similarly high hopes for his match. The crowd gives each man their due response, that is, a strong one. Zayn and Joe are both superb at making a match looking legit and the opening five minutes of the match reflected this. For the most part, slow-paced work from Joe and quick bursts from Sami. Joe sweeps Sami’s feet from the front and Sami takes a front bump forehead first. Brutal. This becomes the general story of the match. Any time Sami gets an advantage, Joe takes his legs out from under him. Joe locks in the Coquina Clutch after delivering a Uranage reversal to the Helluva Kick and that’s it. Very reminiscent to the way Asuka beat Bayley at NXT Takeover: Dallas. Good match, but simpler than I would have hoped to see from these two. Understandable considering the circumstances.”

A backstage promo with Bayley hyping up the Women’s Championship Match.

WWE Raw Tag Team Championships
Enzo & Cass vs Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson

Enzo and Cass gets the upper hand on the champions early in the match. Anderson delivers a big drop kick to regain control of the match and follows with mounted right hands to Enzo. He tags in Gallows. Gallows continues to wear down Enzo and tags Anderson back in. Anderson goes for the cover 1..2..Enzo kicks out. Enzo sidesteps Anderson and Anderson goes flying out of the ring. Enzo gets dragged out of the ring to prevent a tag. He gets back into the ring and gets clobbered by Anderson, cover 1..2..kick out.

Gallows gets tagged back in and delivers large right hands to Enzo in the corner, cover 1..2..kick out. Anderson gets back in. Enzo is finally able to get to the corner and here comes Cass. Cass is going nonstop at Anderson with splashes in the corners and lands an Empire Elbow. Cass lands a big boot to Anderson and then Enzo and Cass land the big splash. Anderson catches Enzo and goes for the cover. Enzo gets his foot on the rope by Gallows pushes it off and 1..2..3.

Winner and Still Raw Tag Team Champions, Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson

Enzo and Cass did their opening schtick that, I have to admit, somehow got tired. They’re not a bad act by any means, but it’s time to mix it up somehow. The same can be said for their matches. While both Enzo and Cass are getting better fundamentally, their matches are simply a long beatdown section on Enzo with a Cass hot tag. As I type this, Cass is doing his hot tag and I just started thinking “I should start paying attention.” Call me fickle, but that’s not good. Poor Karl Anderson ends up getting the pin on Enzo, but Luke Gallows has to push Enzo’s foot off the rope before the ref saw for the win. Karl may be champion, but he should be able to score a clean pin on Enzo goddamn Amore.”

Up next is Nia Jax vs Sasha Banks

Non-Title Match
Nia Jax vs Sasha Banks

Nia Jax is very dominant early in the match. This is pretty much a squash match so far. Nia is doing squats with Sasha on her shoulders in the torture rack. Sasha counters into a sleeper hold to finally mount some offense. Nia throws her down like a rag doll. Sasha lands a DDT into the Bank Statement! Nia powers out of it and slams Banks to the ground followed by a huge splash. Sasha rolls up Jax and gets the 1-2-3!

Winner by pinfall, Sasha Banks

“Sasha Banks continues to destroy her body to diminishing reactions, but I gotta give her credit for heart. Sasha is genuinely good, but there’s only so long you can watch the same six women (if I’m counting correctly) exchange falls and keep it interesting. Still, Nia is a very good base for Sasha and their chemistry kept this match from completely losing the audience. Sasha pulled off an extremely impressive reversal to a vertical suplex where she fell down into a piggyback position on Jax. Again, phenomenal base work there from Jax. Sasha is flopsier than Lita doing a suicide dive. Banks wriggles out of a Samoan Drop to roll up Jax for the flash three count. Competent match, but really not something I would ever expect to see on a special event. Solid effort from the girls, but the booking wasn’t behind it.”

Jinder Mahal and Rusev both have singles matches coming up against mystery opponents.

The Swiss Superman comes out and will be taking on Jinder.

Singles Match
Cesaro vs Jinder Mahall

Cesaro and Mahall go back and forth and Cesaro hits Mahall with a big backbreaker. It appears Cesaro hurt his back on that move. Jinder is taking advantage of that back now. Jinder covers Cesaro to no avail. Cesaro goes for a suplex but can’t because of his back. Jinder hits a running knee to the face. Cesaro starts hitting uppercuts on Jinder but gets whipped into the corner hitting his back. Cesaro still gets the suplex with a bad back showing off his strength. They start trading rights and uppercuts. Cesaro starts hitting running uppercuts on Mahal. Cesaro hits the SWISS-1-9. He hits a lateral press of the top rope, 1..2..kick out by Mahall. Mahall gets distracted by Rusev and Cesaro hits the flying uppercut, cover 1..2..3.

Winner by Pinfall, Cesaro

Rusev jumps in the ring and starts pounding on Mahall. We are waiting to see who Rusev will be facing.

WELLLLL IT’S THE BIG SHOW!

Singles Match
Big Show vs Rusev

Big Show gets a fast start against Rusev with massive chest slaps in the corner. Big Show is just manhandling Rusev. Cover, 1..2..Rusev some how kicks out. Show hits Rusev with repeated clotheslines and Rusev finally counters and takes out Big Show’s knee. Cover on the Big Show, 1..2..kick out. Rusev is now going after the injured knee of the Big Show. Show kicks Rusev in the broken nose followed by a side slam. Cover, 1..2..Rusev kicks out. Big Show goes for the chokeslam and Rusev counters clipping Show’s knee. Rusev kicks Big Show in the head three times and Show still kicks out. Rusev goes for The Accolade and Show counters into a Chokeslam! Big Show delivers another chokeslam! He’s going for another one! And hits it! Big Show drags Rusev into the corner and loads up the Knockout Punch and nails it! Cover, 1..2..3.

Winner by pinfall, The Big Show

Kevin Owens is in the back cutting a promo about his title match tonight.

Crusierweight Championship Match
Neville (c) vs Gentleman Jack Gallagher

I have no idea how to explain half of these moves but I will do my best. Gallagher gets the upper hand to start the match. Neville pulls Gallagher out of the ring and throws him into the barricade. Neville climbs to the top and lands a missile drop kick. Gallagher lands a couple uppercuts but Neville gets control back. Gallagher lands a HUGE SUPERPLEX off of the top rope and goes for the cover 1..2..Neville barely kicks out. Neville face plants Gallagher into the mat. Gallagher takes a nasty bump with his head. The cover, 1..2.. the referee’s hand hits the mat for 3 but Gallagher still kicks out. Gallagher hits two big headbutts and covers 1..2.. Neville kicks out. Gallagher runs right into a superkick from Neville. Gallagher places Neville on the top rope and delivers a wicked headbutt. Jack goes for a superplex but Neville counters and hits the RED ARROW! Cover, 1..2..3.

Winner and STILL WWE Cruiserweight Champion, Neville

The Advocate Paul Heyman cuts a promo and leaves the question unanswered if Brock Lesnar is there tonight or not?

OHHHHHHH MILWAUKEE!

The New Day comes out with what appears to be the New Day Ice Cream! The claim they will be at WrestleMania with the New Day Ice Cream.

Up next, Braun Stroman vs Roman Reigns.

Singles Match
Roman Reigns vs Braun Strowman

This one is going to be fun. A lot of punches flying early by both men. Braun attempts to throw Roman into the steel steps and Roman hops over them. Strowman charges and lands into the steps himself. Roman has an opening. It is quickly closed with a big spinebuster from Braun. Strowman is in control now. Reigns goes for a Samoan drop but cannot hit it. Braun counters and hits a Samoan drop of his own. Roman is in a headlock getting work down by Braun. Braun faceplants him into the mat and goes for the cover, 1..2..Roman kicks out.

Bruan clears off the announce table and goes to powerslam Roman through the table but Roman counters and throws him into the post. Roman finally gets the big man down in the ring. He goes for the superman punch and Braun dodges and nails Roman right in the chest. Cover, 1..2.. Roman kicks out. Strowman goes for a big kick in the corner and takes a tumble over the top rope to the floor. Roman goes for a huge spear and gets caught by Bruan who powerslams Roman through the announce table!

They get back in the ring and Reigns hits a spear on Strowman who kicks out! Roman hits Braun with two consecutive Superman punches, then gets planted by Braun. Braun goes to the top rope and goes for a big splash and misses! Roman hits Braun with a spear, cover 1..2..3!

Braun finally gets pinned for the first time.

Winner by pinfall, Roman Reigns

Backstage Promo:  Mick Foley and Samoa Joe

Joe is walking out for the evening, but Mick approaches him, saying Stephanie has the night off, but if she were here, she would want to make sure Kevin Owens had to prove he was the better man than Goldberg.  That Owens wouldn’t need any help from anybody, so he better not see him again.  Uh-Oh

:::Anthony is unable to continue, as he is having technical difficulties, so the fans don’t know where to turn to, but we hear music, and here comes KEVIN GILLMAN!!!  Looking for the tag, just fresh off his weekend bowling trip, DAMMIT!!  Tag Me Anthony, and here we go….

WWE Raw Women’s Championship:  Bayley (Raw Women’s Champ) Vs Charlotte Flair

This just did not feel right, especially with the two women involved.  Bayley botched a move that people can see a mile away, not once, but twice.  Sasha Banks came out, who earlier in the night defeated Nia Jax.  Charlotte met her head on, and Sasha did not get the upper hand.  Instead, we had Charlotte reaching for the tights in a roll up, and for some reason, the ref allowed Sasha to jump on the apron, and scream that.  This distracted Charlotte, and Bayley hit Bayley to Belly.  So Charlotte’s PPV undefeated streak is done, Bayley retains her title hugging with Sasha.

Winner, and still Raw Women’s Champ:  Bayley, by pinfall

Video:  Seth Rollins from last week’s Raw

Tomorrow Night:  Seth Rollins’ Exclusive Rehab

WWE Universal Championship Match:  Kevin Owens (WWE Universal Champ) Vs Goldberg

Well, this was fun.  Kevin Owens stalled Goldberg for 5 minutes, walking outside of the ring, he then comes back into the ring, demanding the ref to call for the bell.  We hear Chris Jericho’s music, and here he comes.  This distracted Owens for a moment….SPEAR AND A JACKHAMMER….NEW UNIVERSAL CHAMPION!!  In 15 seconds.

The show ends, with Goldberg celebrating in front of his wife and family.

Winner, and NEW Universal Champion:  Goldberg, by pinfall

Kevin’s Thoughts:

Thank you to Anthony Joki for filling in for me tonight, I missed the first hour of the show, but I loved Reigns Vs Strowman, Neville Vs Gallagher was good, but we all watched fir Goldberg Vs Owens.  Love seeing Chris Jericho, and now we are truly on The Road to Wrestlemania.  What were your thoughts on the show?  Send them to me, and I will be here for tomorrow night’s Raw.

Quick Match Results

**Samoa Joe def Sami Zayn, by pinfall

**Gallows and Anderson (C) def Enzo and Cass, to retain Raw Tag Team Titles

**Sasha Banks def Nia Jax, by pinfall

**Cesaro def Jinder Mahal, by pinfall

**Big Show def Rusev, by pinfall

**Neville (C) def Jack Gallagher, to retain Cruiserweight Title, by pinfall

**Roman Reigns def Braun Strowman, by pinfall

**Bayley (C) def Charlotte Flair, by pinfall to retain Women’s Title

**Goldberg def Kevin Owens (C), to win Universal Title